All in the Family

Papaw: Corban would you like some salad dressing?
Corban: No, I don't like salad on my dresses.

Landice, with a marker cap on one finger and a golf ball in the other hand, proudly announces "My dinga, my balls, my dinga, my balls!"

ME to Hayden: "Son, you have to choose...me or your thumb...you can't have em' both at the same time."